VALUES IN TILLMAN'S LIFE EASY TO SEE, APPRECIATE

The way he lived, decisions he made equally impressive

December 2, 2004

Sometimes it's the small and simple things that make a big difference.

In spring 1996, while attending a high school coaches football clinic at Arizona State University, I was introduced to Pat Tillman. Anticipating the opportunity to meet players such as Jake Plummer, I came prepared with a couple of footballs to collect autographs for my son and nephew. Surprisingly, some of the players were less than accommodating. This upset Pat, and so he offered to gather the autographs himself, and he did.

As a person, I found Pat to be polite, unpretentious and respectful to others. At a distance, Pat looked not all that dissimilar from the rest of the players. However, at a closer view, what made him different was the absolute intensity in his eyes. His physique was lean and muscular. He had long hair and wasn't tall. However, he wasn't average by any measure. He seemed to possess an intangible quality that simply drew you in.

After having developed an appreciation for his simple act of respect and kindness toward me, I continued to follow his collegiate and professional careers intently. I admired his style of play, as well as his approach to life. So when I learned of his death, the news hit me especially hard. His decision to serve our nation, forsaking all the material trappings associated with professional sport, deeply impressed me. The way he died touched me, but I was equally impressed by the way he lived and the decisions he made.

It has been said that when someone dies, you don't lose him or her all at once. Rather, you lose them a little at time. I believe this to be true. When someone special to you is gone, you begin not only to recognize what made him or her unique, but you also begin to miss it. I will miss Tillman's non-negotiable integrity, particularly in a day when many professional athletes seem to demonstrate such a self-centered approach to life. Pat Tillman was different, unpretentious and courageous. He appeared to understand his true sense of purpose. His life had meaning.

Most people only dream of making a difference. We all seem to have a desire to leave the world with the knowledge that our life somehow mattered, yet most are unable, or at least unwilling, to make the choices leading to that path toward the direction of purpose. Pride, materialism and many times fear, stand between us, and that very thing for which we would forever be remembered.

Pat Tillman's life is an example of one who heard the hero's call to action. What made him different was his decision to respond. He left this world the same way he lived - leading, out in front, with an apparent disregard for the conventional, safe path. Above all, he was true to himself and his beliefs. He was indeed, a true American patriot.

As a grown man, I am not one to wear a jersey bearing a player's name on the back. However, a couple of weeks ago, at the ASU-Washington State game, my son and I wore commemorative Pat Tillman jerseys. We did so with a sense of pride, feeling a connection between Pat and the sacrifices he made for us.

With the wave of the American flag atop the north end zone and the passing of four Apache helicopters, Pat's life was memorialized. As we said goodbye, his name and number 42 were unveiled, displayed and retired on the ring of honor at Sun Devil Stadium. Everyone in attendance seemed to be genuinely touched by the experience, and shared in the terrible realization of our loss.

One week earlier, at the conclusion of the ASU-Stanford game, one of the Stanford players knelt on one knee, while placing the palm of his hand on the "PT" that had been painted on the field in memory of Pat Tillman. He then looked thoughtfully, heavenward, remaining for a period of time, remembering Tillman. Obviously, this young man had been impacted by Pat's life.

In another demonstration of respect, the University of Arizona football players all wore 42 on their helmets during the recent ASU-UA game. When is the last time you can remember an opposing team honoring one of its past competitors and rivals?

Now, there's nothing that can be said that will add to or detract from who Pat Tillman was, or what he did. And so, I am left reaching, unable to express the feelings of gratitude and respect I hold for him. Nor can I adequately express the sadness many of us have experienced. Nor will I pretend to understand the huge sense of loss his loved ones must have felt, and will continue to experience.

In the end, all I can say is simply: Thank you, Pat.

Mike Wright is a longtime Gilbert resident and a former coach and teacher.